Drawing is something that I constantly want to get better at doing, but I never am able to. And I feel like this is partially my fault.
I've been actively into drawing for about 4 years now, but can I even say I'm actively drawing? It's been forever since I last actually drew something, and when I do I usually just draw my character. The only time I draw something else is during ArtFight.
I want to make my own worlds, my own characters, but how am I supposed to make an entire world when I don't even have a name for the character I've been using for 4 years? I feel like my art could of gotten a lot better than it currently is if I would of drawn more drawings and drawn more unique things. But I don't. And when I actually try, I still don't. I just end up staring at a blank canvas, eventually either scribbling all over the canvas, or just writing out my stream of consciousness.
First off, one of my problems is that I work too fast, and expect things to just work out. Usually when I do something, I can make that happen. But for drawing, I cannot, as drawing is a skill that requires patience, which I don't have. After 30 minutes of doing something, I just have to move on. I know almost everyone is like this, but I have a hard time coming back to stuff. I have so many projects that I just abandoned, not because I wanted to, but because my brain told me it's time to move on.
My other issue is simply ideas. Coming up with ideas and choosing things is one of my biggest weaknesses. A year ago I was supposed to plan a vacation, and I still haven't picked a continent, yet alone a country, city, and attractions. I don't think that vacation is going to be happening. If you force me to pick something that I am passionate about to make, I probably won't be able to make it. The reason I love my character so much is that it shows that I was able to make something. But the thing is that I don't ever make any new characters. I just update the one I already have.
I have gotten better at art within 4 years, but I still cannot draw anything well outside of my character. And I'm frustrated about it. I want to change, I really do, but I just... can't.
Even with this blog, it feels like I have run out of things to say, so now I just rant about how I can't come up with ideas. I feel like I've written this post already. But what am I going to do about it? I don't doodle anymore, but I wish I would. I'm just waiting for something to happen, but nothing ever does, especially when I have to be the one to make the change.